In a post last month, The Critical Question You Must Ask to Get Rid of Clutter, I talked about a single question that will help you view your “stuff” with new eyes. Today, let’s take another look at our possessions and ask a few more questions to help us determine if we have too much stuff and suggestions on how to deal with the things in our house.
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How do I know if I have too much stuff?
It’s a good question and one we should ask ourselves occasionally. As you’re going through things in your house ask yourself:
- Is every surface in my house covered? Do I have clear space or is every square inch covered with something?
- Can I find what I need when I need it? How long does it take for me to find what I’m looking for?
- Do I end up buying replacements for things I already own because I can’t find the original?
- Do I know where things are? Do the others in my house know where things are?
- Does every item in my house have a place where it belongs? I used to talk about things having a place to “live” inside my house.
- Do I follow the rule of “like with like” so that items are grouped together?
- Do I have things stored somewhere other than my house? Does it take off-site storage to hold everything I own? How much money is my “stuff” costing me?
- Do I frequently make excuses for the way my house looks?
- Am I embarrassed by the appearance of my house? Are other family members (husband or children) embarrassed by how the house looks? Do they hesitate to have company over?
- Do I have sentimental items stored away where they’ll be ruined or deteriorate? If these items are so important, why am I not taking better care of them?
- Do I sometimes feel like I’m drowning in stuff? Does my stuff make me feel closed in or claustrophobic?
If the answer is yes to even a few of these questions, then there’s a really good chance you have too much stuff.
Once you admit that you’ve got too much stuff, you need to deal with it. There’s no use identifying the “stuff” problem and then doing nothing about it. And trust me, your kids will be grateful later!
I’ve got too much stuff – now what?
Again, questions help you focus on what to do about specific items in your home.
- Is this item useful? Even it the item itself is useful, are YOU ever going to use it? Many of us hold on to items because we figure we’ll need them one day. We justify keeping things that might be useful when the truth is that if we have too much stuff, we probably couldn’t find the item when we need it anyway. And just because an item could be useful doesn’t mean it will be useful to you.
- Do I love and adore this item? And be honest, you don’t love and adore every item equally. If you don’t love it – get rid of it.
- Is it sentimental? If it is, am I keeping it in good condition? (Peter Walsh talks in his books about honoring sentimental items). But even sentimental items need a limit. If you’ve got space and are keeping the item in good condition, it might be worth hanging on to. However, if you’re short on space then you need to make some choices and prioritize what you can keep depending on your space limitations.
- Do I have adequate space for it? The answer is no if it’s crammed in a drawer or box somewhere – you know the definition of adequate!
- Is this something I can use up? Do I intend to actually use it before it goes bad or expires? If you end up throwing it out then it was a waste of money and space.
- Does this cause me (or someone else) anxiety, frustration, or distress? Unless you live alone your stuff does have an impact on other people. And yes, you need to consider how your stuff makes the people around you feel – it’s only fair!
- What need does your stuff satisfy? (memories, aesthetic, status, intellectual, comfort/emotional). This one may be tough to answer but it may be the most important. Lots of us hold on to things for reasons we don’t really understand.
I want to share an experience I’ve personally had that illustrate the point.
When “stuff” makes you unhappy
Years ago, a family member I was not close to gave me a very elaborate afghan she’d knitted. (Oh, what the heck – it was my step-grandmother). Now I have no doubt that the afghan took hours of work but that’s beside the point. For years I hung on to the afghan simply because it took so much work. People gushed over how pretty it was and acted like she must have really cared for me to have made such a beautiful gift. But here’s the thing – the afghan was not a labor of love that was made with the intent to make me happy. It was simply something she liked to do anyway and it made a convenient gift.
For me the gift represented something else entirely – an estranged relationship. So for years I hung on the afghan but would feel anxious and resentful whenever I looked at it or thought about using it. For the most part it stayed in a container under the bed. One day I decided that keeping the item caused me too much distress and that guilt was not a good enough reason to keep it. I also knew that since it was very pretty, someone else would enjoy it.
I donated that afghan to a local charity and never looked back. Did I ever regret letting it go? Absolutely not! In fact, letting it go made me feel free – free from guilt, resentment, and hard feelings. It was one of the first things I ever did that said, “My feelings count.”Keeping something that makes you feel anxious or unhappy is not good for you. Get rid of it! Click To Tweet
I recently ran across some resources I’ve found very helpful. Chaos to Clutter-Free: 16 Realistic Steps to an Organized Home and Step By Step Deculttering: Your Guide to Less Stuff and An Uncluttered Home are ebooks in the Conquer Your Clutter bundle. They’re just two of the may resources included and if you’re working to get your home organize and under control you might want to check it out. And Peter Walsh has really influenced my thinking about sentimental clutter. He pulls no punches and forces you to examine the relationship with your stuff.
I hope you’ll return to join me during June. Each Monday I’ll add a new post dealing with clutter, stuff, and organizing.
So, how’s your relationship with the “stuff” in your life?